OVER SCENE MUSIC: "Oh! oh! what a lovely war"
STOP ANIMATION SEQUENCE - One at a time the five gimlets
ANIMATION SEQUENCE - The chair disappears, a wedge at a time.
POLICE STATION - DAY
STOP ANIMATION SEQUENCE - The chair rebuilds, a wedge at a time.
SERGEANT, looking at it and scratching his head.
- BENNY'S KITCHEN - DAY
The larder is full.
Benny is eating at a well stocked table.
There is a NOISE at the door.
He stops eating and picks up the rugby ball.
leaves kitchen carrying the rugby ball carefully in front of him.
BENNY'S HOUSE - DAY
Benny looks out. There is no one there.
Steps out, walks to the end of the road, looks down the street.
It is empty.
He looks up the street. In the distance, are a group of children
in a circle playing with a ball.
looks at his rugby ball and then he looks at the children.
tries to get close to the children without being seen. He makes
full use of all available cover, going through garden, detouring
behind houses, climbing fences, hiding behind a hedge he gets so
involved in this he forgets how lethal the rugby ball is that he
is clutching to his chest.
Benny looks at ball, realises what he is doing.
ball carefully at arms length, he crouches down behind the hedge
putting the ball on the ground.
looks through hedge at the children are playing in a circle.
crawls to gate with the rugby ball, carefully he opens gate and
The children are playing.
rugby ball rolls out into the road, slowly. It stops in the centre
of the road.
The children do not notice it and carry on playing. They start moving
away from the ball.
is still behind hedge CURSING. He crawls to the gate and goes through,
Looks around to see if anyone has seen him.
runs to the ball, carefully picks it up and holding it at arms length,
still crouching low, walks towards the circle of children.
He gets quite close and CALLS to the children.
do not turn.
stop playing and turn to look at him.
swings the ball back at arms length, ready to throw it.
is a SHOUT (OS)
Benny stops and turns.
is a POLICEMAN advancing towards him.
Benny crouches down, twists round, with his back to the children.
Benny throws ball at the policeman.
policeman side-steps, and catches the ball in mid-air.
is a TWANG from inside the ball but nothing happens.
Benny is puzzled he straightens up.
policeman with one end of the ball grasped in the palm of his hand
raises it over his head and throws it.
thinking Benny catches ball against his chest. He realises what
he's done and looks terrified.
is a loud metallic TWANG.
Benny winces with fright, looks down and closes his eyes.
When he opens them he sees the blade is sticking out of the ball
at the end away from his chest.
policeman walks up to Benny, shakes him and points to blade.
shakes his head and hands the ball to the policeman.
Still shaking his head he points to the children.
Policeman walks past Benny to the children.
He SPEAKS to the children they shake their heads and point back
at Benny who's walking away very quickly.
Benny breaks into a trot, then a run.
down to a less conspicuously fast walk, he looks behind him.
He cannot keep calm and breaks into a run again.
and turns around casually.
Benny walks the last few paces theatrically slowly and casually.
He enters house without looking round.
BENNY'S HOUSE - DAY
Benny is sitting on a chair by the kitchen table.
Calmly he takes out his cigarettes and matches and puts a cigarette
in his mouth. His hands are rock steady. He strikes a match and
lights his cigarette, shakes out the match and puts it back in the
box on the table.
He takes a long draw on the cigarette, removes the cigarette from
his mouth and exhales.
Puts the cigarette on the edge of the table.
he lets go of the cigarette, it falls on the floor.
He picks it up and replaces it on the edge of the table.
Lets go again, it falls off.
He picks it up and replaces it on the table.
It falls off.
stamps his foot on the cigarette angrily.
POUNDING on the front door.
Benny goes to the front door and it looks like some one is trying
to break in.
He is undecided whether to hold the door or not.
Risking it, he goes to the kitchen and unscrews a gimlet from the
POUNDING and SHOUTING (OS)
Benny returns to the door with his gimlet.
turns rushes back to the kitchen and gets a saw.
Starts frantically sawing the chair leg.
Stops, starts again.
He cannot wait and breaks the wedge off.
Goes to back to the front door fumbling with the gimlet, wedge and
drops the lot on the floor and kneels down.
starts screwing the gimlet into the wedge to hold the vibrating
When he's finished he stands with his back to the door to hold it
POUNDING and SHOUTING stops.
Benny wonders why, then decides to make his escape through the back
races through the house to the back door.
The policeman is standing there with the rugby ball.
He walks in.
retreats backwards into the kitchen.
policeman indicates by pointing to Benny then to a chair that he
must sit, and pulls out a chair from under the table for himself.
sits on his chair.
is a CRACK.
He falls to the floor having sat on a chair with a sawn off leg.
winces with pain.